Performing for an Audience

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started” –Mark Twain

This may seem silly and obvious, but when we face struggling with perfectionism, it’s quite hard to allow ourselves to move forward and actually do something. This is especially true when we know we will be put into the public eye and potentially be judged.

I struggled with performing music when I was younger. I had a lot of nerves when thinking about being on a stage in front of an audience, although I had badly wanted to perform. I would come up with excuses on how the material wasn’t ready or how I hadn’t practiced enough to play a show. However, I was simply just terrified of messing up while being in the spotlight.

Through a process, I slowly exposed myself to performance. I first played guitar in a coffee shop when I was about 20 years old - I was paid with a bag of coffee. I was pretty pleased with the experience, aside from some friends trying to get me to sing when I really didn’t want to.

The first time I sang publicly was for a music competition in my college. When the MC had called my name for introduction, my heart was stuck in my throat, and for a couple seconds, I thought about walking off stage. I played the song, but my voice was tense from nerves, causing me to sing some of the song flatly. It was actually a success to me, and it was good for me to have made mistakes because it helped reduce some of the anticipatory worry of messing up. When I actually did mess up, it helped me realize that it’s not that bad, scary or embarrassing.

The next time I sang and played, people we’re more familiar with who I was and there was a lot of cheering so it helped me perform well, although I was still quite nervous. The stage lights were so bright, so I couldn’t see the audience. This was quite helpful as I pretended that I was just alone practicing the song. I didn’t win the competition but I was simply happy with being able to get through a performance.

The third time was actually the worst experience I’ve had, but everything became easier after that. I had over-rehearsed, so my voice was tired. The whole auditorium was well lit, so I could see everyone. The song just wasn’t sounding good, so in the middle of the song, I stopped due to nerves and giving what I thought was a mediocre performance. I told the audience I was nervous, took a couple breaths, and started playing again; the whole place erupted with applause for my continuance, despite being nervous. This was exactly the boost I had needed.

The audience isn’t a scary group of people out to criticize you for making a single mistake. It’s often filled with people who wish you well and want to encourage the performer. Even if you do get a heckler in there eventually, they don't matter. You are the one who is doing what you want and what you love. It's easy for anyone to criticize somebody. It takes actual strength to do something in front of an audience.

I’ve been blessed to be hired as a musician and perform at a restaurant in the summer during my college years. This helped gain my confidence, as I was not the spotlight, but I could still get used to performing in front of people. I now help lead music in the services at church. I’d say that the adrenaline is always there while playing - it’s not nervousness as much as it is excitement, although they sometimes may feel the same.

Performing isn’t always through music - it can be making a speech, playing a game, or doing something brave while many people are watching. It’s a good skill to get comfortable with because we never know when we will get called upon. Anxiety will subside when we’re confident that at any given point, we can perform in front of others without worrying about making mistakes. We all will make mistakes – life simply moves on. What’s worse is to have never tried. We’re capable of incredible things, but we simply need to get started somewhere.

For further related reading, please check out: Rejection Can Be Good.